Running and Reconnecting

Our High School Group
Me, Tara, Jocelyn and Kelly (missing from photo Martha)
Summer 1988

It’s Saturday morning, 7:30 am.   I look out between the blinds. I can see an icing sugar dusting of snow on the ground. It’s a chilly -4.  I am still a little bleary eyed, but I am up. I am scheduled to meet my high school friend Jocelyn whom I haven’t seen much of since the late-1990's and go for a run.  

Today is one of those days where life hands you a scenario you never imagined. If someone had told us five years ago that this would be our plan for today, I think both of us would have told you that there was greater chance of the world ending (as per the Mayan’s) in December 2012, than there was of the two of us running around High Park.  Yet here I was, peering out the window at the weather and feeling a little apprehensive.   

As fate would have it, my friend Jocelyn has been on a similar path to mine, like me, she has been seeking to make changes in her life and push the limits of her physical fitness. She is more than a little impressive. In the last three years she has taken 78 inches off her entire body, gained 35 pounds of muscle and just finished a triathlon.    

I hope I can keep up.

She arrives and I remark to myself how there is nothing in the world like the magic of an old friend.   They know exactly how to relieve you of any baggage you may be carrying.   As I am sputtering about an injured foot and apologizing because I am consequently only running 5 minute intervals, she just laughs and says “don’t worry about it.  I am here to run with you.”

We soon get moving.  As we head through High Park I notice how stark and sad the trees look, shivering naked in the breeze that blows in from Lake Ontario. The dismal surroundings are in sharp contrast with my mood.  I am having a great time and relieved to find that I am keeping up.    

The next few kilometres are fueled by great conversation.  She tells me about her life; her journey of positive change and the events that inspired her to start. We compare notes on how making a change in one area seems to lead to changes in others. We talk about how we both still consider ourselves to be "works in progress."

We stop. Laughing, we try and take our own picture.  Thankfully a fisherman comes by and takes it for us.  

As we get close to the end of the 5KM loop, my foot starts to give me trouble.  It happens just as we are about to start the torturous Spring Road hill. It’s one if those sleeper hills that doesn't appear to have such a stark incline, but about quarter of the way up your legs ache and you are gasping for breath.    

“ I've never made it to the top of this hill without walking,” I say to her. 

“So come on then, let’s do it together,” she says.  

Today, miraculously it happens. Sore foot and reduced training notwithstanding, I get to the top.  It’s a nice moment. 

As we are walking home, I think about how, strangely, running has taken on a significance beyond fitness for me and how through running I have come to connect with different people and myself in very profound ways.  I think about the vicissitudes of life and how opportunity for renewal presents itself in places like Facebook.  Had Jocelyn's status updates and my 43 Project posts not had a common theme, we might not have reconnected. I am very glad we did. Ultimately I think about how we could have gone for a cup of tea or had brunch, but chose to do this instead. Given path we are both taking, I think this was perfect way to get reacquainted. 

Never quit,

Mary

Coming up:  Horsing around in earnest and investigating the unfamiliar world of racquet sports

Run Like No One is Watching

"30 seconds to go. Do not stop. You can rest when we get to that park bench up ahead" says Marla. She's my next door neighbour and my hero. She's more than ten years older than me, she can talk while she's running and without her I wouldn't be tackling my number one exercise fear.



Spring 1971, two years old
Parliament Hill, Ottawa, ON, Canada


For as long as I can remember, I have been afraid to run because it has constituted a personal indignity. I was a big kid who grew quickly. My coordination never quite caught up. As a child running, I was incredibly slow and painfully self conscious. Over time, I sought ways of getting out of running. I even built my embarrassment into the legend of my personality. Always a good story teller, I was successful to the point that when I played basketball in university they used to say of me that "I wouldn't run if my ass was on fire." It became part of the team lore and somehow through the humour of it all, I managed to actually exempt myself from meeting expectations in running drills and lots of other things. At the time, I thought it was a very good thing.





Marla at the Harry's 8km run in High Park
April 2010



So why am I here now? Because at 43, I am stronger both physically and mentally and don't want to hide behind my personal myths anymore. I want to find out what I can and can't do. Luckily I have Marla, veteran of 12 runs, as my friend and neighbour. She has also agreed to be my running coach.  As someone who participated in her first race when she was 53, she understands how difficult it is to start and shows me just how possible it is to succeed.

So far her influence has had a remarkable effect, today marks the fourth week I have been running. On the first day, I wanted to quit after the first minute, but here I am four weeks later and up to nine three minute intervals over a distance of about 3.8km. The shocking part about it is, I am actually having a good time. That said, the physical aspect of it is a challenge, and the psychological aspect is even harder. For me, getting through the interval requires mental tricks which range from not thinking about it at all to making deals with myself that sound something like "just to the lamp post, then stop" or "make it to the drugstore. Do not stop now."

So where, other than in an endless loop around High Park, am I going with this?

On October 27th, I will participate in my very first race, the Toronto 5K Women's Run*. I also have a second objective. One that is a little more complex and best described by what I see when I watch my Goddaughter play.  Undaunted by any hurdle she allows nothing to stop her, when she runs, she does so with the wild abandon of someone completely living in the moment.  As I watch her in my mind's eye, I realize that I need to achieve one more thing.--I need to learn to run like a child who thinks that no one is watching.

Never quit,

Mary

Next time: Tips for keeping moving and staying injury free.

* To help get me across the finish line at the Toronto Women's 5 km, I will be dedicating my run to two of my dearest friends, Sheri and Julie, both of whom have milestone birthdays on October 30th. They are two very important people in my life and without them, I would never have made it this far. Once again I will rely on them and their inspiration to take me a little further.