Run Like No One is Watching

"30 seconds to go. Do not stop. You can rest when we get to that park bench up ahead" says Marla. She's my next door neighbour and my hero. She's more than ten years older than me, she can talk while she's running and without her I wouldn't be tackling my number one exercise fear.



Spring 1971, two years old
Parliament Hill, Ottawa, ON, Canada


For as long as I can remember, I have been afraid to run because it has constituted a personal indignity. I was a big kid who grew quickly. My coordination never quite caught up. As a child running, I was incredibly slow and painfully self conscious. Over time, I sought ways of getting out of running. I even built my embarrassment into the legend of my personality. Always a good story teller, I was successful to the point that when I played basketball in university they used to say of me that "I wouldn't run if my ass was on fire." It became part of the team lore and somehow through the humour of it all, I managed to actually exempt myself from meeting expectations in running drills and lots of other things. At the time, I thought it was a very good thing.





Marla at the Harry's 8km run in High Park
April 2010



So why am I here now? Because at 43, I am stronger both physically and mentally and don't want to hide behind my personal myths anymore. I want to find out what I can and can't do. Luckily I have Marla, veteran of 12 runs, as my friend and neighbour. She has also agreed to be my running coach.  As someone who participated in her first race when she was 53, she understands how difficult it is to start and shows me just how possible it is to succeed.

So far her influence has had a remarkable effect, today marks the fourth week I have been running. On the first day, I wanted to quit after the first minute, but here I am four weeks later and up to nine three minute intervals over a distance of about 3.8km. The shocking part about it is, I am actually having a good time. That said, the physical aspect of it is a challenge, and the psychological aspect is even harder. For me, getting through the interval requires mental tricks which range from not thinking about it at all to making deals with myself that sound something like "just to the lamp post, then stop" or "make it to the drugstore. Do not stop now."

So where, other than in an endless loop around High Park, am I going with this?

On October 27th, I will participate in my very first race, the Toronto 5K Women's Run*. I also have a second objective. One that is a little more complex and best described by what I see when I watch my Goddaughter play.  Undaunted by any hurdle she allows nothing to stop her, when she runs, she does so with the wild abandon of someone completely living in the moment.  As I watch her in my mind's eye, I realize that I need to achieve one more thing.--I need to learn to run like a child who thinks that no one is watching.

Never quit,

Mary

Next time: Tips for keeping moving and staying injury free.

* To help get me across the finish line at the Toronto Women's 5 km, I will be dedicating my run to two of my dearest friends, Sheri and Julie, both of whom have milestone birthdays on October 30th. They are two very important people in my life and without them, I would never have made it this far. Once again I will rely on them and their inspiration to take me a little further.